The Bafflegab Podcast
So your humble narrator has finally gotten off his ass and done something with his life.
I speak, of course, about alpaca fondle.
If you or your loved ones want to listen to me ramble, here’s ya go: The Bafflegab Podcast.
I hope you’ll join me. I hope I can keep this thing going. I hope I’m not gonna end up lookin’ in the Malibu.
Join me, wontcha?
And check back here every so often as I plan to start using the printed word again as well. Again as well? Again as well.
The Birth of a Podcast
If you’ve been a fan of Hot Chicks with Douchebags or my writing over the years, I’m pleased as a pickled Brony to announce that I’ll be starting a podast in the next few weeks.
A podcast, you say?
Hasn’t that ship sailed?
Well, yes. I suppose the Carolla/Nerdist/WTF axis of supremacy has saturated the market.
But I like to gab, and I like to rant, and therein the two shall meet.
Check this space for more info soon. I hope you’ll give it a listen. And if you hate it, I guarantee a full refund of all karmic exhaustion.
Winding Down Hot Chicks with Douchebags
Sad news, fellow ‘bag hunters, readers, and internet wanderers.
Actually, strike that.
Not sad news. Appropriate news. The end of an era, I suppose.
I am currently in the process of officially ending Hot Chicks with Douchebags as an every-day blog. I’m planning on migrating over here to my long dormant, sadly neglected sister site, Lucky Punkass, where I’ll post more regularly.
If you’re a fan of my writing, or think I suck (either is fine), please stick around and check in every so often. And we shall see what becomes of what becomes.
In the meantime, I’m quite proud of this in-depth podcast interview I did with Mandy Stadtmiller last week while I was in New York. I thought it would be appropriate to do a quality interview at the moment HCwDB ends and Mandy did an amazing job. Check it out here.
The Day White People Died
In 2008, they said it was a fluke. Yesterday was the nail in the coffin.
Hundreds of years of entitlement, white privilege, arrogance, and condescension coalesced in the perfect visage of one Willard M. Romney. I can think of no more iconic emblem of the arrogance and delusion of America’s clueless suburban narcissism than that honkey-ass clown.
But in a sense, Willard was beautiful.
Romney was the perfect crystallization of those who saw history as “history,” a made-up fairy tale mythic fantasy with heroic white people with perfect hair and blonde wives raising their children leading the ethnic masses to a higher Jesus peak. Theirs is an Americana shot through a prism in which the massive financial windfalls of stealing land, killing natives, using black slaves and Chinese pseudo-slaves to build your country, then cashing in with biased lending laws throughout the mid-century, are simply the vapors of forgotten nothings. The mechanics that hide reality under a beautiful fairy tale of Right Wing Supply Side Jesus teaching the mud peoples how better to live their lives.
This sham of heroic John Galt Ayn Rand pretend-power has gone on for centuries. Standing on the backs of injustice and claiming justification and manifest.
No humility in the Romney brood.
No sense of larger perspective for the Aryan trophy wives and photocopy sons.
Let them be the last of a white, right wing Christian America of phony “values” covering simmering rage and xenophobia. A fake white America made up of delusion and arrogance that rose up, and shamed, the greatness that was the intellectual legacy of the 18th century Thomas Jefferson deists. For all the intellectual acumen of the great thinkers of American history that they inherited, they squandered it through hubris and arrogance. They were, and are, frauds in suits. Cheap imitations of intellectuals who claim white privilege and then deny that it even exists.
They are ghosts of an America that never existed, except in some 1950s Mayberry fantasy.
They are frauds in pretending that the unwashed hoardes are lazy, greedy, and want to take away their “hard work.” Such hard work, these inheritors and privileged legacies of a past they refuse to acknowledge.
I welcome with glorious arms the new ethnic America. The Latino, black, Asian, and multicultural voters who, yesterday, saved us from the abomination of a Romney presidency.
Who voted to legalize marijuana and gay marriage.
Who voted in brilliant senators like Elizabeth Warren, Sherrod Brown, and Chris Murphy, among many others.
Hark! Angy, aging, white, Christian America, to wit! You are relics. Ghosts. Frauds. And shams.
Return to your fictional media and your fictional Ronald Reagan 1950s-era movie.
There is no room for you in the future. The real real America has spoken. And we ain’t going back.